College Age Q&R with Ron Kangas in Calgary, Canada — August 18-19, 2018.
How do I turn a natural friendship into more of a companionship, one in which we can pray together, read together, pursue the Lord together, etc.?
Okay, when it comes to a relationship, here it is a natural relationship between two sisters, neither one of them can turn the whole relationship herself because you can’t control or shouldn’t even try to control the other party. So, you’ve had a kind of friendship, pleasantly in the natural life, and now within you is the longing to bring in a genuine spiritual element.
I need a companion not only a friend, okay?
A companion is someone who matches you. When Daniel was in Babylon, he had the three young Israelite boys that matched him. This is the difference. So, if something is happening in you, then you have the heart to be able to pray together, to be in the word together, to pray for people you care about, and to reach out to them together. You can’t impose that on the other party. What you may seek is are you able to vitalize that person.
You’re not making her a project but you’re just testifying what’s been going on in you. And you just express your own longing: “I just long for companions that match the spiritual longing that’s increasing in me. I’d like to be able to pray with someone, as well as converse. I’d like to be able to read the word with someone as well as do other things.”
What you’re doing now is just opening your being. But whether or not the other party is willing to match you, vital companions and vital companionship begin with one person becoming somewhat vital. Then the Lord connects you with someone who is the same or who has the desire for the same. But if for whatever reason the other party doesn’t respond you don’t want to cause an offense, you don’t want to hurt someone, but you’ll have to realize “I need to look for a companion elsewhere.”
I want to emphasize a companion is a peer who matches you on every possible spiritual level. Now you have the same pursuit. This deepens your fellowship. It enriches your prayer. It increases your concern for the salvation of others in the shepherding of others. So, something like that needs to take place.